This is The Nooner, a short daily (Mon-Sat) newsletter slash podcast that has its very own section within Dispatches from Inner Space.
To see the first post, which doubles as an explainer, click here.
Also a quick reminder that you can listen to the podcast version of each post wherever you listen to podcasts.
The coolest thing you can be is apathetic
Across all history and cultures, not caring what people think has been the enduring mark of coolness.
We call it integrity, we call it authenticity, we call it badassery. We love the guy who does not give a @#$%.
Why? Because we know how much it costs. We know that to do what you want, to follow your own guiding lights, is to risk dire social consequences. You could be denied job opportunities, sexual partners, party invitations. People might call you names. People might laugh at you. People might avoid you, and say mean things about you behind your back.
But if you can manage to toss up a middle finger to all that, well, we salute you (even if we’re one of the people avoiding you in public).
The thing is, though, that you can’t just say you don’t care what other people think. I mean, obviously you can say it. Everyone loves to say it. They want to be cool.
But if you say it, it probably isn’t true. It’s one of those pesky paradoxes. As soon as you tell someone you don’t care what they think, it begs the question of why you are telling them you don’t care what they think, unless it’s to try to influence what they think, which...yeah.
The people who truly don’t care, for whom the judgement of others is so much water sliding off the the back of a duck in a pond, it doesn’t even occur to them to tell anyone because they actually don’t care.
So if you ever feel the urge to talk about how you don’t care what people think, stop for a second and evaluate where that urge is coming from.
Then, instead of saying something that isn’t true, dig deep and quietly let go of the thing that made you want to say it in the first place.
You can be one of the cool ones, but not with words.
Click at least one of these or else…
…501 seagulls will cut their tethers and drop you into the ocean the next time you’re riding a giant piece of fruit.
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